Rules of Dating/Transcript
WARNING: PLEASE NOTE, THIS TRANSCRIPT HAS BEEN CONCLUDED BY UNSIGNED USER “B PURCELL” AS INCOMPLETE AND A WORK IN PROGRESS; MORE COMING SOON.... * (Title card appears. The bus is constantly jumping up and down) * Kid 1: '''Yeah, so I asked Stephanie to Rog's party. * '''Kid 2: '''Stephanie's rad. Who are you inviting to Rog's? * '''Robot: '''I shall ask... Shannon. ''(looks dreamily) ''I will ask her now. * '''Shannon: ''(talking to other girls) Aaa! Oh no! It's that Robot Jones! Eww! * '''Kid 3: '''Don't make eye contact with him. * '''Kid 4: '''Maybe he'll go away. * ''(The girls left) * Robot: 'Hello, Shannon. I would like to enquire you about your availability. ''(bump) ''How would you like to come with me to the-- ''(bump) Activate magnetic traction assister. (bump) I would like you to accompany me this Fri--''(the bus stops)'' * 'Bus Driver: '''Bus stop! * '''Shannon: '''Um, I'm getting off here. * '''Robot: '''I would like to invite you to-- * '''Bus Driver: '''Stop horsing around back there and get off! * '''Shannon: '''Hush, Robot. Such a dork. * ''(transitions) * 'Robot: '''Good evening, Mom Unit. What items are on the nourishment agenda? * '''Mom Unit: '''Before eating nourishment, you must study your modern Robot Code, laws 8 through 12. * '''Robot: '''Grumble. Grumble. Grumble. * ''(transitions) * '''Computer: '''Today's lesson: The modern robot's Rules of Conduct, laws 8, 9, 10, 11. * '''Robot: '''This seems most uninteresting. I would much prefer to study... Shannon. * ''(electrocutes Robot) ''Computer: Pay attention, Robot. Rule #8: The modern robot never speak unless spoken to by a human. * 'Robot: '''Hhh. ''(Computer threatens Robot) * 'Computer: '''Rule #9: A robot must speak loudly and clearly to be understood by humans. Rule #10: A robot must always utilize its services to help human counterparts in a crisis. Rule #11: A robot must follow the rules and regulations of any establishment it is in at the time. Any unit breaking the rules will apologize and report to a refueling port. And finally, the most important rule of all: Any malfunctioning robot must protect surrounding humans by self destructing. Master these rules and you too can have successful human/robot integration. * '''Robot: '''I would sure like to get intergrated with Shannon. * ''(transitions) * '''Mr. McMcMc: '''Your primary concern in elementary algebra is to factor, factor, factor! Here's an example. * ''(Robot looks dreamily at Shannon) ''Mitch: Dude, what is up with you? * 'Robot: '''I wish to achieve intergration with Shannon. But, it seems my current methods are ineffective. * '''Mitch: '''You know what your problem is, Robot? You've got no game. * '''Robot: '''I have over 50 games on my CD-ROM. * '''Mitch: '''Aww, not that kind of game. I mean game like, the rules on how to get a date with the chick. * '''Robot: '''Rules? Yes, I do have rules on how intergrate with humans. ''(Mitch gives Robot a thumbs up) * 'Mr. McMcMc: '''Shannon, would you please solve the problem on the board. * '''Shannon: '''What? Aww, man! * '''Robot: '''Shannon seems to be having trouble with that math equation. I wish I can help her. * ''(flashback) * '''Computer: A robot must always utilize its services to help human counterparts in a crisis. * Robot: 'That's it! ''(Robot goes to the board) * '''Shannon: '''What are you doing? * '''Robot: '''Offering my assistance. * '''Shannon: '''Get lost, I don't need any help from-- * '''Mr. McMcMc: '''Did you say help? Well, that's a grand idea! Maybe, Robot can help Shannon with her math homework! * ''(prints number) ''Robot: Here's my telephone number. Please call at your convenience. (Shannon left) * (transitions) * '''Mrs. Westerburg: '''Now, don't forget to call your study partner, Shannon. * '''Shannon: '''That dorky robot probaly plugged the phone into his old home waiting for me to call. * '''Mrs. Westerburg: '''You know, that little robot can help you get into one of those Ivy League colleges you always dreamed about. * '''Shannon: '''Ivy League? * ''(dreams) ''Cool Guy: So, I told Professor Jenkins: Why don't you simply let me skip the class? * 'Shannon: '''Ahh. Dreamy college guys. * ''(transitions, the phone's ringing) * '''Robot: I'll get it! * (Flashback) 'Computer: '''The modern robot never speaks unless spoken to by a human. * ''(Shannon hangs up) * Operator: 'If you decide to make a call, please hang up and dial again. * '''Robot: '''Alright, I will. * ''(Shannon calls again, the phone rings) * '''Shannon: '''Why don't you say something, you freak! * ''(Shannon hangs up) ''Robot: 'This is becoming more of a bummer. * '''Shannon: '''And so, I like, wait there on the phone for him to say something forever. * '''Girl: '''You poor thing. ''(school bell rings) Well, see you there at Roger's! * 'Shannon: '''You! What's up with that creepy phone call last night? * '''Robot: '''I was adhering to rule #8. * '''Shannon: '''Rules? What are you talking about? * '''Robot: '''The Modern Robot Code of Human Intergration. * '''Shannon: '''Look, I don't know what magazine you get your "intergration" rules from, but you better stop being such a loser! Be at my house, 7pm tonight. * '''Robot: '''Activating time. Hours until 7pm. 9 hours 59 seconds. 9:58. 9:57. 9:56. 9:55. ''(transitions) ''4. 3. 2. 1. ''(timer ends, Robot rings the bell) * (Flashback) * 'Computer: '''A robot must speak loudly and clearly to be understood by humans. * '''Mrs. Westerburg: '''Oh, well, hello. * '''Robot: '''Hello, I am Robot Jones. I have come to offer my assistance to... Shannon... with her math study. * '''Mrs. Westerburg: '''Well, aren't we the polite little man... uhh, machine. Please come in, I'll go get Shannon. Why don't you have a seat? * ''(Robot scans, and gets the chair. Mr. Westerburg screams) * 'Robot: '''I am Robot Jones. I have come to meet Shannon--- * '''Mr. Westerburg: '''Stop! I'm not sure what the rules are in your crazy robot house, but around here, we use our "indoor voices". * '''Robot: '''I have violated one of your house rules. Accept my apology. Please redirect me to the nearest electrical refueling port so that I may reboot and reflect on my mistakes. * '''Mr. Westerburg: '''Uh... okay. * ''(Robot goes inside the refueling port) * 'Shannon: '''Now, what am I doing? * '''Robot: '''I am observing rule number 11. * '''Shannon: '''Oh criminy. * ''(The phone rings) * '''Shannon: '''The phone! ''(answers) ''Hello? I know, I wanna go to Roger's, but I gotta try and to *** this... ugh... super dorktimus robot! * '''Mrs. Westerburg: '''Shannon, who are you talking to? Category:Transcripts